It’s one thing for Comcast’s website to be down and I have to call up to pay my bill. It happens. Though my ISP’s website being down is something of a bad omen. But if the sole contents of the “cancel your account” page is “call this 800 number,” you’ve failed at life. Like, that ‘an hero’ dude looks down on your failed ass from whatever pit he ended up in. Just saying.

(Because I wasn’t exactly clear above, the company in question is Columbia House, and they fail at a lot more than just account cancellations. Comcast isn’t much better, but there’s a Comcast office a block and a half from where I work so I can at least avoid the god damned phone call.)